What is my true calling ???

Is writing my true calling ?? I don't know much and even I can not create stories.. my thoughts never take shape of any being.. they are always free flowing..

I can not even claim that I have read much... what all reading I have done is only completely absolutely fiction...

what I think may be the figment of imagination, an influence of my surroundings or just plain blabbering...

but still writing is so much fun... all these non-sense thoughts when come into being, I feel as if I don't know them now. As soon as they leave me and become a word on to paper I am not able to relate to them at all...

It seems as if they have flowed from somewhere else and I am just a spectator looking at them playing.. forming different shapes.. which may or may not have some sense...

some random thoughts come and go.... but when they do not make sense to me... how others will make sense out of it...So, no writing is not that ....

Right... Right... but I will go on writing this non-sense and may be someday when my words will start making sense... I will understand what I want to do with my life...

Light & Shadow

No matter how much light is there

shadow's existence is always there ...

Some may argue then why not

let us always remain in darkness...

But by being in darkness...

you are not avoiding the shadow...

You are giving your whole

existence to the shadow...

But once you decided to fight shadow

and come out into the light...

You will grasp this fact that

whenever light increases, shadow decreases ...

Euphoria !!!

Somedays like today are the days when you feel detachment...

You know that outside is hot and polluted...

but still you feel that its raining and cool breeze is blowing waiting you to take it with you...

you want to go out and play in the rain ...

live life.. break out of routine... have fun... just do whatever you want... do things at the spur of the moment...

You dont feel connected to the world around you ... but you are happy...

nothing matters.. not even yourself.. its just plain joy...

Joy all around... state of euphoria..

Technology vs human touch !!!

Technology has defintiely made life easier but somehow very complicated...

easier in the sense that now we are connected always...

loads of knowledge is at our disposal...

anything we want to know anywhere in the world...

buy anything anywhere in the world...

now nothing is difficult...

I love technology but yet I miss that personal human touch...

calls now have been replaced by chats...

letters have been replaced with e-mail...

I still remember when I was in my college...

everytime I used to visit my home the first thing I used to do is to buy lot of inland letters :0 (yeah its an extinct kind of postal mail form)

And then every week I used to write letters to my home...

even used to send letters to my friends in different colleges in India and abroad... yeah imagine...

and for sure I used to receive reply.. and it was so much fun to see those personalised letters...

where from handwriting you were able to understand how a person is feeling...

letters on different kind of papers to suit the ocassion...

yes it was so much more fun...

Technology is good yet am I missing something ??

Tough times call for this !!!

लहरों से डराकर नौका पार नहीं होती ,
कोशीश कराने वालों की हार नहीं होती

नन्ही चींटी जब दाना लेकर चलती है ,
चढ़ती दीवारों पर , सौ बार फिसलती है
मन का विश्वास रगों में साहस भरता है ,
चढ़कर गिरना , गिरकर चढ़ना ना अखरता है ।
आखीर उसकी म्हणत बेकार नहीं होती ,
कोशीश करने वालों की हार नहीं होती

दुब्कियाँ सिंधु में गोताखोर लगता है ,
जा जा कर खली हाथ लौटकर आता है
मिलते नही सहज ही मोती गहरे पानी में ,
बढ़ता दुगना उत्साह इसी हैरानी में ।
मुठी उसकी खली हर बार नहीं होती ,
कोशीश करने वालों की हार नहीं होती

असफलता एक चुनौती है , इसे स्वीकार करो ,
क्या कमी रह गयी , देखो और सुधर करो ।

जब तक ना सफल हो , नींद चेन को त्यागो तुम ,
संघर्ष का मैदान छोड़कर मत भागो तुम .
कुछ किये बिना ही जय जेकर नहीं होती ,
कोशिश करने वालों की हार नहीं होती ।
कोशीश करने वालों की हार नहीं होती

-Shri Harivansh Rai बच्चन

My kind of place !!!

I have lot of dreams.. some big ones ... and by big I literally mean BIG...

and then there are small ones too...

and then there are some which always will be a dream... yes they are practically unrealistic childish dreams... its a picture of the world which a child has in young tender age, where he still thinks he is the reason all eyes twinkle....

where he thinks that everyone belongs to him...

where he trust every person to take him in his arms and love him...

yes... I want to go back into that world...

the world which now looks like a dream to me now...

a world which is made up of all my hopes and love...

they represent all trust and faith I have in people...

I will not say things dont go wrong there...

it does like any other place but then goodness still prevails there...

things always work out in the end...

there are hardships but faith always wins in the end...

love binds one and all...

people dont hesitate in trusting others...

they dont hesistate in helping others... they dont wait for something bad to happen...

they work hard to see that nothing bad can ever happen to the people...

I dream of a world whose pillars are love and hope...

Did I say above that it will always remain a dream ? I think I am underestimating the power of hope and good will....

I know deep down inside such a world is possible...

but then I know right now I am not courageous enough to do all this...

but someday I will for sure... someday I will muster all my strengths and follow my heart

and fulfill my dream

I will ... I know I will ...

why ???

why at times you feel you are not good enough

why at times you feel you are not able to do what you want to do

why at times you feel restrained by constraints set by you

why at times you feel helpless because of your own emotions

why at times you dont let your impulses overcome your brain

why at times you feel you are nothing but a puppet

a puppet who willingly has given the string to the society

and now does not have the courage to take back what was rightfully his

why ???

Unknown is magnetic :-)

well well... its august already :)

it is that phase of my life when hundred thoughts crosses my mind

and I am not able to decide on to a single one

where I want to leave everything which is there is with me currently

and wish to take a new unknown journey towards a new land

where there are new people and new adventures

this phase of life has become a little monotonous and boring..

though the thought to explore the unknown is quite scary

sometimes my very relaxed life tries to lure me back

into the comfortable state in which I am now

but then I think if this comfort is becoming the obstacle to live life to fullest...

but yes talking about unknown is easy..

but venturing out is very very difficult..

i Just hope that someday I get enough courage to break out of this comfort zone and explore the world unknown...

God bless me !!!!!